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if it means so much… then do sth abt it…
why why why…. it has been a period of ups and downs… emotional struggles…
God, plse help me…
i’m going to let go and move on…
bible school is really coming to an end soon and as the days to graduation draws nearer and nearer, there’s a huge part of me unwilling to end this phase of my life. yea, i know that when bible school ends, a new chapter, new phase, new season of my life starts. but yet, if my life was a story (and i mean… it is a story), i would say that this chapter of my life is the best that i’ve experienced so far!
i forged many new friendships. some really random ones… but some just grew deeper and stronger during bible school days. looking back, this 5 months have definitely revolutionized my life. not long ago, as i was on my way home, i told God how much im gonna miss bible school. then God spoke, showed me how much i’ve grown. tho during these 5 months, there were ups and downs, but yet, i clung on to God.
wat more can i say? feelings and emotions welling up on the inside of me. i really cant bear to see the international students leave but yet, i know and we all know that when they go back to their hometowns, God is going to use them in such a great and extraordinary way! simply becoz they set aside and wholly dedicated these 5 months to the Lord.
i’ll definitely miss the early morning praise and worship before lessons starts… drinking coffee to stay awake… helicopter heads (haha)… the sleeping trinity (yulin, weilin, me)… batam emerge… choinging assignments… ban mian at best coffee shop… bubble tea days… and the many other crazy things that all of us did tgt. but most imptly, the great, interesting, and impactful lessons that we had tgt!
today, we had such an encounter… such a visitation from God. there was such a great move of God at bible school. the love of God overwhelmed and flooded the B4 auditorium. many students teared… i teared… hearts softened in the presence of God as God did a work in each and every one of our lives…
after the session ended, it was just such an emotional time as we went round giving each other a hug… thanking each other for the times that we spent tgt…
1 more week in SOT…
and i will definitely cherish this one week…
thank You Lord for the amazing time i had during these 5 months… there’s nth more that i could ask for! thank YOU!
Lord, let my life be sth that You can be proud of..
when i go up to heaven and if ever God plays a video on my life from the time before i accepted Him into my life and till the day i die, i wanna see myself growing even deeper in Him as time pass. i wanna see myself changing, evolving… from a bu qi yan de caterpillar to a really beautiful butterfly. i wanna see myself growing in the video.
today as i spent time with the Lord, God really touched me. and out of the blue, i started talking to God in chinese. and man… the words that i spoke out caused me to tear.
yes, i want You to be proud of me. i want You to be proud of the life that i’m living for You.
God came in such a great way today.
God: why are u weeping my child? dun weep… becoz I love you.
and at that moment, the Father’s love flooded my room. God came, wiped my tears and embraced me.
there’s really really nth more that i can ever ask for.
God, i truly truly love You from the depths of my heart.
when i go up to heaven, i want You to know who i am. i dun want to end up like those who claim that they know You and on that day when they are in heaven, You say that You actually dunno them. i dun wanna come to that stage. i want You to know me. and i want to know You so much more than ever before.
You’re the love of my life. (:
